MIL - forum/internet code for Mother-in-law.
Mine is very religious and very old fashioned, so you can imagine how well we get along.
She also espouses a very different style of parenting to what I believe in, and practice.
On Christmas day, after the dinner when the menfolk had gone into the sitting room and the womenfolk remained in the kitchen, E asked to get up on my lap and had a guzzle. I let her, of course.
MIL, while making herself a cup of tea into which she poured rice milk, as she doesn't take dairy:
"Do you not think she's getting a bit too old for that now?"
I shrugged my shoulders. "She'll know herself when she's ready to stop," I said.
MIL: "But would you not just give her a drink of milk?"
Me: "Why would I give her cow's milk?"
Cue....silence. No response, until hubby's aunt, her sister, started to ask some genuine questions about whether E is ok with not having guzzles when I am not there, which I was of course happy to answer (she's fine without when I'm not around, but when I am with her she tends to ask often enough). She couldn't argue with me - she doesn't take cow's milk herself. Hubby's nephew, her grandson, is very dairy intolerant, and has spent years with constipation or diarrheoa any time he takes anything with cows' milk in it.
I don't think she'll ever see, or admit to, the benefits of breastmilk and breastfeeding. She isn't the kind of person to change her opinion regardless of the facts. But at least I shut her up. Hah.
Showing posts with label breastfeeding. Show all posts
Showing posts with label breastfeeding. Show all posts
Sunday, 30 December 2012
Sunday, 25 November 2012
Breastfeeding Nazis, the Breastapo and Godwin's Law
There are some terms which are used to describe women who are passionate about breastfeeding. They are used in various places including online forums, as well as in the mainstream media, newspapers and other sites which I am not going to link to, but google the terms "Breastfeeding Nazi" and "Breastapo" (from Gestapo) and you'll see a whole range of familar sites come up.
These terms are extremely offensive, and I am going to explain why.
The Nazis were a political party in Germany, full name National Socialist German Workers Party. They are famous because among their policies were the eradication of impure races and peoples, including most notably Jews, but also including Roma/Gypsy people, black people and homosexuals as well as people suffering from various degrees of mental or physical disabilities.
The Gestapo were the Secret Police of Nazi Germany, and were responsible for carrying out many of the atrocities perpetrated by that state against its own and other peoples.
Breastfeeding mums do not wish to put formula feeding mums in gas chambers and kill them. This is what the Nazis and Gestapo did. They killed people who were different to them, who acted differently, who thought differently, had different ideas about what society should be like. I repeat, they killed them.
People who do not breastfeed may find that those who do are smug and self-righteous - personally I disagree or think that at most, this is a very small minority of breastfeeding mothers - but absolutely no one can claim that they aim to eradicate mums who artificially feed their children.
The terms are therefore extremely offensive. Not just to breastfeeding mothers, who do not deserve their comparison with such horrible figures from history. No, the worst offence is to all those people who died or suffered terribly under the Nazi regime. Those who died in the gas chambers, those who died in the camps of disease and starvation, those who died on the roads, those who fell ill and suffered, those who were forever traumatised by the fact that they survived and others didn't, and that they had seen such horrors.
To call someone who you simply disagree with, or who disagrees with you, a Nazi or compare them to the Gestapo, is disgraceful behaviour. Open a history book or turn on the Discovery channel and watch a documentary. Learn what these terms really mean before you throw them out there. It is scary that this is addressed to professional journalists as well as everyday women.
There is an internet phenomenon known as Godwin's Law - that in any argument, eventually someone will compare the other side to the Nazis, and because this is such a worthless argument, the person who does so is automatically judged to have lost the argument.
Please think about the people who died before throwing a term such as Nazi into a conversation, argument or debate. It is not one to be used lightly without denigrating the victims of that awful ideology.
These terms are extremely offensive, and I am going to explain why.
The Nazis were a political party in Germany, full name National Socialist German Workers Party. They are famous because among their policies were the eradication of impure races and peoples, including most notably Jews, but also including Roma/Gypsy people, black people and homosexuals as well as people suffering from various degrees of mental or physical disabilities.
The Gestapo were the Secret Police of Nazi Germany, and were responsible for carrying out many of the atrocities perpetrated by that state against its own and other peoples.
Breastfeeding mums do not wish to put formula feeding mums in gas chambers and kill them. This is what the Nazis and Gestapo did. They killed people who were different to them, who acted differently, who thought differently, had different ideas about what society should be like. I repeat, they killed them.
People who do not breastfeed may find that those who do are smug and self-righteous - personally I disagree or think that at most, this is a very small minority of breastfeeding mothers - but absolutely no one can claim that they aim to eradicate mums who artificially feed their children.
The terms are therefore extremely offensive. Not just to breastfeeding mothers, who do not deserve their comparison with such horrible figures from history. No, the worst offence is to all those people who died or suffered terribly under the Nazi regime. Those who died in the gas chambers, those who died in the camps of disease and starvation, those who died on the roads, those who fell ill and suffered, those who were forever traumatised by the fact that they survived and others didn't, and that they had seen such horrors.
To call someone who you simply disagree with, or who disagrees with you, a Nazi or compare them to the Gestapo, is disgraceful behaviour. Open a history book or turn on the Discovery channel and watch a documentary. Learn what these terms really mean before you throw them out there. It is scary that this is addressed to professional journalists as well as everyday women.
There is an internet phenomenon known as Godwin's Law - that in any argument, eventually someone will compare the other side to the Nazis, and because this is such a worthless argument, the person who does so is automatically judged to have lost the argument.
Please think about the people who died before throwing a term such as Nazi into a conversation, argument or debate. It is not one to be used lightly without denigrating the victims of that awful ideology.
Friday, 23 November 2012
Breastfeeding to two, and beyond.
The World Health Organisation (WHO) advocates breastfeeding for at least two years. (WHO link)
The Health Service Executive (HSE) in Ireland advocates breastfeeding for at least two years. (HSE link)
My daughter, AKA "E" AKA "Ruffian child" recently turned two, so I like to think I have now achieved the minimum goal. I plan to let her wean when she is ready. She's a smart kid. She'll know when that is. At the moment it is helping her immune system, her brain development and her emotional development.
So many women in Ireland don't breastfeed at all, and others only do so for a very short amount of time. So breastfeeding up to two years, and beyond, while in line with official recomendations, is actually very unusual in Ireland.
Nevertheless, I like to think of the guidelines as a minimum, that we have now achieved. We'll see how long we continue, and whether society's attitude to breastfeeding, extended or not, changes as time goes on.
The Health Service Executive (HSE) in Ireland advocates breastfeeding for at least two years. (HSE link)
My daughter, AKA "E" AKA "Ruffian child" recently turned two, so I like to think I have now achieved the minimum goal. I plan to let her wean when she is ready. She's a smart kid. She'll know when that is. At the moment it is helping her immune system, her brain development and her emotional development.
So many women in Ireland don't breastfeed at all, and others only do so for a very short amount of time. So breastfeeding up to two years, and beyond, while in line with official recomendations, is actually very unusual in Ireland.
Nevertheless, I like to think of the guidelines as a minimum, that we have now achieved. We'll see how long we continue, and whether society's attitude to breastfeeding, extended or not, changes as time goes on.
Thursday, 8 November 2012
It's just because
Another poem. This was imagined in the days of worry, and written the day I got the bad news. I am not religious at all, I am an atheist. I don't think there is a "Meant to be", I don't think there is a reason or a higher purpose. I think that my miscarriage is just one of those shitty things.
It's just because
It’s not because I wore a belt with my jeans
It’s not because I barely felt sick
It’s not because I breastfed my daughter
Nor because I walked the dog almost every day
And wanted to stay fit and healthy for my pregnancy.
It’s not because I ate chocolate one day
And stuffed my face with vegetables the next
It’s not because I ordered teeny tiny cute cloth nappies already
Nor because I told so many people before the first three months were passed,
And jumped up and down all happy and full of excitement and hugs.
It’s just because the world is sometimes cruel and chaotic
And deeply darkly tragic
It’s just because of that that I have to say goodbye to you
Before I even met you.
It’s not because I carried my big girl in my arms
Or held her on my hip as we walked
It’s not because I had a glass of wine the week before we found out
It’s not because I wondered about names and what we’d call you
And what you’d look like or what your first word would be.
It’s just because the world sometimes works this way
This sometimes harsh and random way,
It’s just because of that that I have to say goodbye
Before I ever got a chance to say hello.
It's just because
It’s not because I wore a belt with my jeans
It’s not because I barely felt sick
It’s not because I breastfed my daughter
Nor because I walked the dog almost every day
And wanted to stay fit and healthy for my pregnancy.
It’s not because I ate chocolate one day
And stuffed my face with vegetables the next
It’s not because I ordered teeny tiny cute cloth nappies already
Nor because I told so many people before the first three months were passed,
And jumped up and down all happy and full of excitement and hugs.
It’s just because the world is sometimes cruel and chaotic
And deeply darkly tragic
It’s just because of that that I have to say goodbye to you
Before I even met you.
It’s not because I carried my big girl in my arms
Or held her on my hip as we walked
It’s not because I had a glass of wine the week before we found out
It’s not because I wondered about names and what we’d call you
And what you’d look like or what your first word would be.
It’s just because the world sometimes works this way
This sometimes harsh and random way,
It’s just because of that that I have to say goodbye
Before I ever got a chance to say hello.
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