I think I'm ovulating again...some signs of fertility.
Scary. Because I could become pregnant again. I don't feel ready yet.
Partly because I think I'll be terrified when I get pregnant again, that I'll be afraid of losing the baby again, that I'll live in fear and stress the whole way through the pregnancy, or the first three months at least.
Also though, because I'm not ready to be pregnant again yet. I'm still grieving. I'm still sad about this baby, the one I lost, the one that will never be.
I'm still in the process of saying goodbye.
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